Tap tap tap...

Is thing on?

Not sure what possessed me to return to this ol' blog today. Angst? Nostalgia? A desire to get back to writing stuff down in one place?

Anyway, here I am posting again after letting this place go dormant for a years.

Not even sure where to start, just wanted to get something posted. I've been thinking a lot about the cruelty of hope, maybe if I can get my thoughts together I'll post them here soon.

Later!

I read a book: Gone Girl

It's been a while since I graced this blog with my presence but I just finished a really great book that I wanted to share.

"Gone Girl" by Gillian Flynn was recommended to my by the fabulous Lina Holmes (I like to imagine that we're besties but in reality she recommended it on her podcast, Pop Culture Happy Hour - a must listen if you haven't already, it's a highlight of my Friday each week.)

Linda suggest that you read it without reading anything about it first. It was fun having no idea what to expect. I'll just say that it's an adult book with some strong language and some sexual context - neither gratuitous.

a day for pioneers

Today, the 24th of July, marks the anniversary of the day that the first Mormon pioneers entered the Salt Lake Valley in 1847. It is a day of parades and fireworks, bonnets and dutch oven dinners. But mostly it is a day for epic stories of incredible sacrifice, courage and faith.

On this Pioneer day, I am reminded of a poem by Carol Lyn Pearson. I was fortunate enough to hear her recite it a couple month ago and find myself going back to again and again. This is how I want to think of my ancestors, who gave up so much and did such extraordinary things. I draw courage from their imperfect examples to do difficult things and face my unique challenges and opportunities with faith.

Pioneers   

My people were Mormon pioneers.
Is the blood still good?
They stood by in awe as truth
Flew by like a dove
And dropped a feather in the West.
Where truth flies you follow
If you are a pioneer.

I have searched the skies
And now and then
Another feather has fallen.
I have packed the handcart again
Packed it with the precious things
And thrown away the rest.

I will sing by the fires at night
Out there on uncharted ground
Where I am my own captain of tens
Where I blow the bugle
Bring myself to morning prayer
Map out the miles
And never know when or where
Or if at all
I will finally say,
“This is the place,”

I face the plains
On a good day for walking.
The sun rises
And the mist clears.
I will be alright:
My people were Mormon pioneers.

“Pioneers”
by CAROL LYNN PEARSON

Here is a video of her reciting it. She is really a remarkable woman and a true pioneer.

I read a book: The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks

Heaven help me, I read a book and forgot to blog about it. And trust me when I tell you, this was a really good read. I say trust me because, though two dear friends recommended it to me, it doesn't sound like any fun at all.

The Immortal Life of Henrietta Lacks

Any attempt to explain this book, put me to sleep. So I'll leave you with a review by Jab Abumrad, of Radio Lab (if you've never listened to it, you're in for a treat.) He says it so much better than I ever could.

Honestly, I can't imagine a better tale.

A detective story that's at once mythically large and painfully intimate.

Just the simple facts are hard to believe: that in 1951, a poor black woman named Henrietta Lacks dies of cervical cancer, but pieces of the tumor that killed her--taken without her knowledge or consent--live on, first in one lab, then in hundreds, then thousands, then in giant factories churning out polio vaccines, then aboard rocket ships launched into space. The cells from this one tumor would spawn a multi-billion dollar industry and become a foundation of modern science--leading to breakthroughs in gene mapping, cloning and fertility and helping to discover how viruses work and how cancer develops (among a million other things). All of which is to say: the science end of this story is enough to blow one's mind right out of one's face.

But what's truly remarkable about Rebecca Skloot's book is that we also get the rest of the story, the part that could have easily remained hidden had she not spent ten years unearthing it: Who was Henrietta Lacks? How did she live? How she did die? Did her family know that she'd become, in some sense, immortal, and how did that affect them? These are crucial questions, because science should never forget the people who gave it life. And so, what unfolds is not only a reporting tour de force but also a very entertaining account of Henrietta, her ancestors, her cells and the scientists who grew them.

The book ultimately channels its journey of discovery though Henrietta's youngest daughter, Deborah, who never knew her mother, and who dreamt of one day being a scientist.

As Deborah Lacks and Skloot search for answers, we're bounced effortlessly from the tiny tobacco-farming Virginia hamlet of Henrietta's childhood to modern-day Baltimore, where Henrietta's family remains. Along the way, a series of unforgettable juxtapositions: cell culturing bumps into faith healings, cutting edge medicine collides with the dark truth that Henrietta's family can't afford the health insurance to care for diseases their mother's cells have helped to cure.

Rebecca Skloot tells the story with great sensitivity, urgency and, in the end, damn fine writing. I highly recommend this book. --Jad Abumrad

Just read it. The writing is superb, the facts are fascinating and the storytelling is intriguing.

what I've been watching

Because I know that you want to know, here are a few gems that I've discovered amidst the dearth of summer programing.

SYTYCD - that's right, it's that time again when I get all sorts of crazy about a reality tv show. I think it's the best but I'll leave it to you to decide. So You Think You Can Dance is back again with slightly different format (no results show) which shouldn't really change too much. Last week was the first real episode (I don't count the audition episodes) and I think they've got some great dancers this year. It's on Wednesday nights - set your DVR (the ability to skip over the commercials makes it oh so much more enjoyable).

The Newsroom. It's brilliant, takes place not so long ago in 2010 and draws on news stories that are still relatively fresh and pertinent: the BP oil spill, the tea party and the recession. And the characters are great too (I'm partial to Maggie). This is an HBO show, so if you don't have HBO, you may have to wait for it to come out on DVD or something - it may be available online somewhere. (BTW, who gave this girl HBO? The perks of living with roommates, that's all I can say.) Also, because it's premium cable, I think it's worth mentioning that it's totally clean. And by clean I mean there's no nudity/sex/violence - at least in the first 3 episodes, and it doesn't really seem like it's going to go that way, but I could be wrong. There might be a couple swears - I usually don't notice the language unless it's really bad - so maybe I'm a bad source, but as far as premium cable shows go, it's clean. It doesn't shy away from politics and it's pretty critical of republicans, so I'm not entirely sure if it's republican friendly, it might drive republicans nuts or maybe they love it, I just don't know. Any Republicans out there who care to weigh in? Also, there's a lot of talk about Utah in the third episode which was pretty cool.

Here's a clip from a scene that I particularly liked:

Bunheads. And now for something completely different - or maybe just a weird hybrid of the first two... hmm. This silly little show is surprisingly entertaining. Like Amy Sherman-Palladino's Gilmore Girls, this show is well written, filled with witty banter and pop-culture references. I may have watched the first 3 episodes last night - and despite musings that she show is slipping (I'll admit, I enjoyed the first 2 episodes more than the 3rd) I'm going to see where it goes. The pilot itself, stands alone as a quirky bit of fluffy goodness that hooked me right in.

So that's what I've been up to. 

seeing Mormons at their best

A little something I wrote while on my recent trip to Scandinavia.

This weekend I attended a mid-singles conference near Stockholm - I felt a little silly for planning a vacation around such a conference but the opportunity to experience a real live Swedish midsommar drew me in. Our awkwardness was quickly overcome after we met a few people and in the end, we had a rather smashing time. Today as a sat in our sacrament and testimony I was overcome with the feeling that this group was taking care of each other in a beautiful and profound ways and I felt honored to be in their company, to benefit from their love and kindness, to observe true acts of charity that though at times took non traditional forms, when recognized, were perfect. I was overcome in that moment and forgot all my questions - inconsistencies and unjustices became secondary to what it is that we do best.

We Mormons are at our best when we overlook our differences and reach out to succor one another. It is moments like these, though they are not particularly Mormon, that keep me here in the church. So many of the things that I cherish in life so many of the good things in my life are so closely tied to my church, that to leave it would be too devastating. There are parts that I could do without but the community is to precious to give up.

84 hours without power

Friday night I left work around 7, stopped by the grocery store and planned to park it on the couch for the rest of the evening with some mindless television. (I may or may not have watched multiple episodes of "Say Yes to the Dress" before a SYttD spin-off show came on, it's all a bit of a blur.) I had 3 air conditioning units blaring and I was comfortably zoned out when I started hearing all sorts of commotion outside. I opened the door to see gale force winds* threatening to blow my pots off my step. I rushed out into the storm to move my flower pots to what I estimated to be a safer position and by the time I got back inside I was soaked.

And before I could dry off, everything went dark and all I could hear was rain and the wind outside. I peered out the window and couldn't see much but the sky alight in bursts green and pink. And I decided it best to step away from the window. I rummaged through my drawers to find the lighter I had bought last year in anticipation of the hurricane and felt around the shelves of my linen closet for the brick of tealights that I bought on an impulse at IKEA over a year ago. Before long my bedroom looked like I was prepared for a seance, the only thing missing was the Ouija board.

I looked up the weather on my phone and which surprised and a bit relieved to read that it only said "severe thunder storm warning". I had sort of expected something a bit more dramatic but if that was all it was, I figured I'd probably survive.

Now 84 hours later, I still have no power at my house. I've managed to find places to sleep, stay cool, recharge my phone and even free wifi - skills I picked up on my recent trip and have happily fortunately come in handy stateside.

Currently my biggest concern is laundry - my summer wardrobe was already meager and I've clean run out of clothes. Fingers crossed, the powers back tonight.


* Perhaps not actually gale force as I have no idea what it means, only that it sounds impressive and it was hella windy out.

home again home again

Well, we made it home and I'm fighting jetlag in the middle of heat wave while trying to work as many hours as I can this week. Needless to say, there will be lots of diet coke imbibing and I hope to get my act together and post some more pictures of my trip sooner than later. 

It is good to be home if only for my big comfy bed. But I find myself waking up in the middle of the night confused as to where Kellee is and why it's so dark outside.

Stay posted for lots of good stories and mediocre pictures to come!

getting our feet wet in Oslo

Figuratively and literally, Oslo was were we got our feet wet, braved the storm and hit the ground running (how's that for mixing metaphors er... idioms er... cliches). I don't believe in easing into a trip or allowing myself some time to get over jet lag - to much to see and precious little time to fit it all in.

During our day and a half days in Oslo, we went to the city hall where they present the Nobel Peace Prize. (We didn't get to go in because they were setting up for a special awards ceremony for Aung San Suu Kyi who was awarded the peace prize 21 years ago but has been in prison and unable to accept the prize until now. We were also in Norway at the same time as Lenny Kravitz, which I'll tell you more about later.)

Murals at City Hall depicting Nordic myths.

We took a ferry to a peninsula where many of Oslo's museums are housed including the Kon Tiki and Fram museums which led me to believe that Norwegians are kind of crazy and oddly ambitious. Odd in that they take on some pretty bizarre projects. I'm just saying, a 3 year trip into the artic would probably discourage me from seeking out the South Pole but not this Norweigan dude Nanson. (btw, it's driving me crazy that this computer won't let me do links, maybe I'll have to come back and edit this post later.)

Later that day we went to the ski jump, Norwegians are pretty serious about their skiing.

The next morning we headed out to the Norsk Folkemuseum where we saw this impressive stave church.

More stave churches and lessons I've learned along this trip to come.

Greetings from Denmark

Well, Norway was breathtaking - though a little damp we saw some incredible sights and are now drying out in Copenhagen. I had been to Copenhagen once before but as my visit was only about 4 hours long, I only knew that I wanted to come back. Top on my list of things to do in Copenhagen: eat danishes and visit Tivoli (a Hans Christian Andersen themed amusement park). I am happy to report that neither have failed to delight. More details and photos to follow.

Hej hej!

London layover

We opted for a long layover in London so that we could see a few of the sights and so I could eat some mushy peas. A few of the highlights pictured below: lovely English garden at Hyde Park, changing of the guard, the Tower Bridge and St. Paul's Cathedral.

Next stop Oslo.

my bags are packed

Maybe you've heard but I'm going on vacation. I leave today and over the next two weeks, I'll be visiting Norway, Denmark, Sweden and Finland. That's right, I'll be on the move, soaking up of that midnight sun and doing my best to avoid getting soaked in the inevitable rain. From experience I know that there may be more rain than sun, but I'll take it.

I'm going to do my best to post pictures along the way - wait a second, whose blog is this?

I know I'm not much of a posting pictures kinda blogger and of late I haven't been a post much of anything kinda blogger, but I bought myself a fancy ipod touch for the trip and plan to make use of it. It's kind of like a pocket ipad, it has a camera and I can blog from it and chat. I'm hoping it was worth the investment because I'm having a hell of a time getting itunes from my old computer to sync with it - ugh computers, it's all smoke and mirrors to me.

Stay tuned. Tomorrow, 10 hour lay over in London and we're going to do our best to make it count!

marching for marriage equality

As a single girl, marriage is something I'm all to apt to dwell on. So, I figured it was about time that i got over myself and did something for someone else for a change - I donned my new Sunday dress and my cutest walking shoes and made my way to my first Pride Parade.

Yesterday I marched with the Mormons for Marriage Equality group at the DC Pride Parade and it was one of the prouder moments of my life. There were tears, hugs, looks of shock and amazement, cheers, high-fives, kisses and heart felt exchanges. I felt the love that God has for all of his children - when he said that he doesn't look at the outward appearance but on the heart, I believe he meant it. And I experienced a lot of heart along that route.

There are a dozen reasons that I support gay marriage and most of them are deeply tied up in my Mormon faith and heritage. I know that this puts me at odds with some of the leadership but I felt confused when I said nothing and I experienced joy, love and peace when I marched.

Plant ALL the plants!

I had great ambitions for this weekend. I had such great dreams for my little mess of a yard. Okay, really, my goal was simple plant all the plants that were sitting in the weed patch that I like to imagine will someday be a real live vegetable but for now is over run by this vicious weed could surely eat me alive should I be taken in by it's lush foliage and tiny purple flowers. But I will not be fooled by it's quaintness. I've learned my lesson. What starts out cute and lovely gets all kinds of ugly mid summer (I almost spelled that midsommar - guess who's excited for their Midsommar in Scandinavia?). So I dug and pulled and dragged and transplanted and I quickly went from this:

to this:

Btw, if you haven't read Hyperbole and a Half, stop whatever you're doing and go there right now. 

You're welcome.

I had 2 flats of annuals, 3 perennials and 2 tomato plants were in desperate need of being put into the ground and while I only got half of the annuals and both tomatoes planted, I did move a bazillion rocks out of what I imagine was once intended to be a rock garden but had subsequently turned into weed patch with dozens of cobble sized rocks looming at various depths beneath the surface. And because I'm a sadist, I bought another tomato plant at wholefoods in the afternoon, because, summer just isn't worth living without sweet 100's, right?

While I'm feeling a bit defeated about my silly little yard (remind me to never buy a house), I did manage to fold ALL the laundry! A small victory as it had started form a small mountain of rumpled clothes that threatened to block the door to my room. I'm going to go back to planning my vacation now.

stay tuned

I've got all these ideas and thoughts swirling around in my brain and I haven't managed pin any of them down yet. But rest assured, I've got so many things to talk about that when I finally figure out how to say them, they may prove interesting. How's that for non-committal. For now, I leave you with this video which sort of blew my mind and got me all sorts of excited for my favorite summertime event, So You Think You Can Dance - which is NOT like the Bachelor. Not all reality TV is smut. They're called standards, people. 

Iron and Wine, "Boy with a Coin" with Flamenco Dancers.

stuff I watched so you won't have to

Okay, so I watched the second episode of girls and yeah, we're dunzo. It was worse than the first - why do women feel the need to compete with the boys in the grossness category - yikes! Take my word for it, you don't need to waste your time on this hot mess.

Also, I went to see Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy the other day and it was the most confusing hour and a half of my life. It didn't help that we missed the first few minutes of the movie but honestly, though I recognized a few of the actors, I have no idea what happened.

So I guess this is a post about sparing you from watching stuff that I have deemed lousey - so if you haven't seen Smash yet, you're not missing anything. It is aweful for completely different reasons than the other two - I keep telling myself that I'm going to stop watching it but it's one redeeming feature, it's a train wreck - warning excessive eye rolling might cause permanent damage. 

pull yourself together

So there has been a lot of talk about this new show called "girls" and because I currently have HBO (thanks roomies) I watched it on demand last night. And, well, it's interesting and it had it's funny moments. But seriously, girls, pull yourselves together.  

If I were to have a catch phrase, I think that would be it, "pull yourself together". I probably say it to myself a dozen times a day and I credit this phrase for most every slightly productive thing I manage to see through. When I want to ignore my alarm and sleep the day away, when I get annoyed at the Washington Metro System for making me wait, when I watch cupcake wars and have no cake in the house to satisfy my cravings, I have to stop and pulling myself together. So, I get it life is tough, the economy is lousy and life hasn't turned out like you dreamed, but come on, pull yourself together! And by that I mean, when you've had a bad day don't turn to booty calls and drugs - it's a pretty low bar I'm trying to set here but for some reason I feel the need to spell it out.

Yet, the show has it's moments that feel really honest and funny (I loved it when the friend describes her boyfriend's touch to a creepy uncle - because though I haven't a creepy uncle, I've had such a boyfriend). I sort of dig the flawed characters and rawness of it all. And it should come as no surprise that despite it's raunchiness, I'll probably keep watching it, even if the only joy I get is by muttering, at at times hollering at my tiny screen, "oh, come. on. PULL yourself together!"

lesson learned

My mother, the master gardener*, is adamant about wearing gloves while doing any sort of yard work or planting. I've often dismissed the idea because I don't really like the way they feel and if they're not freshly washed, they can be sort of gross.

Mom's favorite**

Well, I learned my lesson. Last week after pulling weeds and digging around my garden my hands were a mess. I'd broken a couple nails and the next day I had a rediculous hangnail situation which led to the an infection that left my left thumb swollen and throbby for 5 days. I think I am finally on the mend but I hadn't realized how much I use my left thumb until it became so infected that I found myself swearing every time I tapped it against my desk or tried to button my pants.

Time to invest in a few more pairs of gloves and band-aids - I don't want to risk loosing half of what separates me from the apes.



*I know that a master gardener is an actual title, a title which my mother hasn't officially achieved but if you've seen her flower garden, you'd agree that she has earned honorary.

** These cotton gloves dipped in latex are her favorite - they really do the trick - keeping your hands dry while allowing them to breath and grip. Also, machine washable.

candy eggs and easter bonnets

I hope that you all had a lovely Easter.

The Easter Bunny came early this year, so I was well into my candy by the time that Easter rolled around. I'm now in the process of weaning myself off the sugar - which may prove difficult as I've still got a bag of Cadbury Mini Eggs in my cupboard (remember, I'm saving them for an emergency).

My Aunt committed me months ago to go to the sunrise service at Arlington National Cemetery so I rolled out of bed at 4:50 am, threw on several layers of clothing, wiped off the smudges of makeup from the day before and made my way to the cemetery - making a couple stops along the way to pick up my sister and a friend. When we got there it was still dark but by the time the service started the sky was getting light. All in all it was nice service with good music, though I couldn't help think that it would have been pleasanter at 10 am.

After a nap and a shower, I went to my usual church meetings and the Easter program was very impressive. I am continually amazed by the musical talent in my ward. The talks were brief and focused on the life and resurrection of the Christ. It was a truly lovely meeting.

Later I was looking for something to watch on the tellie when I came across Easter Parade. For all musicals that I watched as a child, this one had slipped by me. I wasn't able to watch the whole thing, but the ending scene is just precious.

As a grand romantic gesture, Judy Garland's character sends Fred Astaire's character an Easter bonnet (this top hat with a white rabbit inside) to show him that she still loves him. Don't you just LOVE her dress, and those gloves! Not to mention Fred's coat and tails, the dancing the singing - it's all just makes my heart skip a beat!

I'm not Joan Rivers and this isn't the red carpet

Easter is just a couple days away and I'm beginning to worry that I haven't taken full advantage of cadburry mini-egg season. Isn't it sad when we let something like candy take precedence over commemorating the resurrection of the Savior - something to work on for sure.

Also, if I were to have kept lent this year, when do I get to stop?
And when was I supposed to eat fish?

I've never really understood lent. Honestly the only time I ever gave anything up was as a missionary I gave up Christmas music and TV - I know, I'm quite the model of sacrifice. I did mention that I was serving a mission - for the Lord - for 19 months.

Last  year I decided to give up Diet Coke. I lasted a day and a half. I wasn't prepared (read: hadn't stocked up on Excedrin) and when my first headache hit, I fought it for an hour then made haste for the 7-11 for that magic elixir that pours from their enchanted fountain and cures all minor ailments.

This year I did something a little different, I gave up commenting on the way people look. I won't pretend that it was something that I had really planned, but it seemed like an appropriate mental exercise at the time. It was around the time when that BYU student received a note from a fellow student calling her out for dressing provocatively and it was all over Facebook. Someone made a comment, in response to the hullabaloo, that it is never appropriate to comment on the way someone looks. And I thought, really? never? and after thinking it over, I concluded really. hardly ever. Even comments that are intended as compliments can objectify the subject if they are based solely upon physical appearance. And I started to think about all the editorializing I do both in my head and to those around me about other people's appearances. And what about that running monologue about my own appearance.

I decided it was time to stop it. That's right, I was stopping it way before Pres. Uchtdorf made it cool. I'd be commenting on someones hair or shoes or clothes and I'd catch myself and I'd stop it. Whether the comments were good or bad, if they focused on the superficial, I stopped myself in my tracks and found something else to think about or steered the conversation in another direction.

from House and Home.

To be clear, I have allowed myself to recognize beauty, I allow myself to observe the world and express my preferences. But I have tried to cut out the commentary and eliminate the judgment that I so often indulged in. By doing so, I started to see the world and the people around me a little differently. And in time, I found my inner monologue was quieted a bit and filled with other concerns.

So maybe this lent thing isn't such a bad idea - maybe I'll figure out when I'm supposed to eat the fish next year.